Today, March 2nd, is my grandmother's birthday. She was known to me and my brother as 'Mommie.' because she didn't want to be called any of those 'grandmotherly' names. And yes, she spelled it with 'ie' instead of 'y.' But she was every bit a grandmother and more to me and my bother. I loved her dearly.
Mommie was born on March 2, 1897 and died on January 11, 1985. She died of breast cancer that was not diagnosed until it was too late, because she didn't believe in doctors. She had been treating the cancer, topically, with 'home' remedies. It wasn't until my Aunt saw her getting dressed and saw that her breast was almost eaten away by cancer, that Mommie finally stubbornly agreed to go have it checked out. I'm stopping here to give a gentle reminder to all my female blog followers, as well as myself, to please have a mammogram done. The National Cancer Institute recommends having a screening mammogram done every 1 to 2 years. I know it is painful to have your 'boobs' smashed (as I call it), but it is necessary. There, I said it, now I will get off my soap box.
The influence of my grandmother, as well as my mother, helped to shape the person I am today. My grandmother was just as much a mom to me as my mother. Her home was my second home. My brother even returned to live with her after he got out of the Navy. I went home to Mommie's everyday after school. There, I had extended school of sorts. Mommie was a retired school teacher and she took advantage of every opportunity to 'school' me. I was writing in cursive long before my classmates, because Mommie taught me. She taught me English, Biology and yes, the dreaded History, which was her favorite. But more than academics, Mommie taught me about life. She was the one who had the 'talk' with me. My mom was uncomfortable discussing the 'birds and the bees' with me, but Mommie pulled no punches and shot straight.
Mommie took me to church with her until my parents decided to start to go to church regularly. At that time, she was Pentecostal, so church was kind of a different adventure to me. Not only did she take me to church, but she also talked to me about the Lord and the Bible. Those seeds that she planted took root in me and bore fruit when I accepted Christ. And not only did she 'talk the talk' but she lived it and her faith was strong and evident in her life. I remember a couple years ago, when my brother was struggling with believing in God, he said if there is a heaven, I know that Mommie (our grandmother), Ma (that's what he calls our mother) and you (yours truly) will be there.
Some grandparents take a 'hands off' approach to grandparenting, but not Mommie...literally. She was gentle, kind, and loving but there were consequences if you misbehaved. I only got three spankings in my life (yes, I deserved more) and two of the three were given by my grandmother. No sparing the rod and spoiling the child with her.
Mommie never complained about having me or my brother around. She seemed to enjoy it and so did we. It all seemed very natural and her love for us was genuine. Now as I consider my relationship with my grandchildren and how natural it feels to do the things that I do for them and how genuine my love is for them, I realize that Mommie lives on in me. I may not be exactly like her in many ways, but her influence is obvious in the way that I grandparent. I only recently realized that grand-parenting seems so natural to me because my grandmother had such a strong influence on my life.
I miss Mommie terribly, but I am thankful that she was my grandmother. She left a legacy of grand-parenting that hopefully I can emulate.
Happy Birthday, Mommie!
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